The Art of You

You can share a lot in a kiss,
The slightest brush of my lip against yours, comforting.
I can smell you.
My cheek against you like a cat.
It's like talking.
Lips moving without making a sound. 
My hand strokes your chest unconsciously.
It's not about passion.
Nor is it about sex.
It's the essence of you,  
A taster, 
A treat.
Appreciating the art of you.
Gentle, complete.
You are a treat xx

The only picture I have of you is when you fell asleep

I suppose I should delete it, move on, clean, cold, cut off break.

But then there will be nothing 

It is blurry and pixelated.

You look tired.

I still want to stroke your hair and cover you up to keep you warm.

Take off your glasses and put them safe.

Make sure you are comfortable before I close the door

Just so I know you will be all right

When I hear the foxes bark it feels like I am dreaming.
I can't remember your face,
Just the feel of your skin and your breath catching in your throat,
The passion catching fire after smouldering for so long.
It was never far away,
And now my heart beats faster,
Nothing gained but a lingering heat, an itch,
My insides running to catch up.
In my head things seem slow, unreal and unorganised.
I can't make sense of it all. 
I don't know if  I am meant to.

I miss you
I can't help but miss you
It's the little things that no one else seems to do 
They're gone and I miss them
I'm not afraid to say it

I miss giggling 
I miss feeling cared for
I miss caring for
I miss holding hands and stroking fingers
I miss stoking that fire, rattling that cage and setting it free.

I can't help it

I can't look at you.
I can't bear to see it.
I like to believe you think about me.
The thought of never seeing you again makes me so painfully sad.
So much amounting to so little.
It doesn't just disappear,
I've learnt this,
You will too.

I imagine you saying those words and my heart beats faster, 
Almost leaps out of my chest.
Pounces on the notion of together forever.
Pounces then falls.
No one there to catch it you see.
So I pick my self up and carry on.

If you read this...

Laying by your side looking at you from the corner of my eye.


Do you know I am there?


My nose against your cheekbone, 


I breathe a tune waiting for you to join in.


We used to know this one.

It's 2am

I'm kneeling on the floor wearing 3 layers.

I feel so contained.  So complete in myself.

So alone.  Separate. 

A unit of one.

I wish I had arms around me.  A safe enclosure to rest my head upon.

Just for a little while.

Just for times like these.

Not to heal me,

Not to carry me,

I can walk,

Just to acknowledge me.

To see and understand without expectation.

Someone I can ask without feeling disadvantaged.

Somewhere I feel entitled, worthy.

Somewhere I recognise.

Somewhere real.

Real.

Hold on

I said to the Moon,


"You make me want to be a better person.  
 You do.  
 I want to be pure when I look at you.  
 I want to be pure and full of light.  
 A creative being with love in my soul and joy in my eyes.  
 I look at you and want to breathe as deep as I can.  
 Your cool white light fanning the flames in my belly.  
 You are my future.  
 You are my hope.  
 My everlasting.  
 My love. 
 It is and always will be a pleasure to gaze upon you and feel your energy."


The Moon replied,


"You are welcome.  
 We are part of each other.  
 It is your light that makes me shine.  It is the light of the Universe  within us all. 
 It is a pleasure to watch over you.  
 With me you are always safe, always loved and always within reach.  
 Make your life the way you want it to be.  
 Honour me and yourself, always and forever I will be here loving you  and your  work."


Kinship, respect, honour and love.  Don't starve yourself of these.

Dreams.


If you had everything you dreamt about it would be reality.


And if you haven't got anything to dream about you're just... Happy.

I wish I could be everything to everyone,


But there comes a time when I have to make myself happy,


When I have to step out by myself,


Hold my own hand and show myself the way.


You could follow,


But your path is different